Just a few of my old journals

Do you keep a journal? Do you re-read old pages to check in with your past self?

My favorite way to start the day is to sit outside with a huge mug of coffee and my journal. Those morning scribblings warm up my brain and clarify my thoughts. Before putting a completed journal on the shelf, I skim through to see if there’s anything I want to jot down elsewhere: story ideas, inspirational quotes, To Do list additions, etc. The other day, I finished a journal started in 2016 (misplaced until recently) and found some nuggets of wisdom on the topic of books.

Will you permit me a slight detour?

When I left my teaching job, I struggled with nagging guilt. Though I wanted to write, it felt weirdly uncomfortable to have so much free time after 30 years of a boss-imposed schedule, and my pension was waaaay smaller than my former paycheck, so…

I took part-time jobs teaching French to adults and small children. Familiar territory, including lots of unpaid time gathering curriculum materials and creating lesson plans. I guess my routine-bound brain needed that gradual transition, but by the end of that year, I was miserable, especially over how much writing time I’d lost. So naturally, I turned to my journal to noodle out the pros and cons of quitting. No big surprise—I finally left teaching behind and took up writing full time.

Which brings me back to the journal entry where I finally resolved to quit that low-paying, time-sucking job and get serious about writing.

Here’s what I wrote as part of an imaginary conversation with my younger self:

Don’t put everyday busyness before what matters most to you. You can’t build a life out of cleaning, running errands, or working at a boring job—though you will have to do all those things. Make room every day for some of what you love most.

Books are the golden thread running through my life. I’ve been in love with books ever since I was old enough to know what they are. Come to think of it, the boring parts of my work were more bearable because they involved books. And the greatest life advice I’ve received has all come from books.

Paraphrasing Wayne Dyer: Don’t beat yourself up over past mistakes. “I refuse to should on myself.”

Eckhart Tolle: You can only live in the now.

Helen Gurley Brown: You can “mouseburger” your way to the top – keep quietly plugging away until you’re really good at what you do. Always learn.

All those books on midlife: Hey, pay attention to your old dreams, the ones you set aside to be a mom, a worker, a wife. Do they still fit? If not, which new dreams have emerged? Go for it!

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Good stuff, right? Encouraging too, to see that those piles of self-help books I devoured years ago delivered something of lasting value. Fun to watch past me figure it out.

How about you? Can you share a bit of wisdom you found in books? I’d love to hear your thoughts.